chop chop

My hair is getting the chop tomorrow.

It shall be my last visit to a hairdresser for almost a year (unless it suddenly strikes my fancy in Nepal, or if I get gum in my hair....which unfortunately happened with some frequency when I was younger, my curls would be propelled with masses of crackling static force and snatch & grab to jumpers, other people's faces, their lip gloss, glass windows, carpet, pets etc etc thus inevitably reel in sticky clumps of gum..)

I'm thinking volume and shape, is the way to go for my haircut. Something that looks effortlessly chic - without any effort.

[images: Valentino Vamp]

Yes, I realise that this is an unattainable desire. Essentially since I'll be camping for many months - I can't imagine what my curls will reel in.

A hive of bees and a dash of hairspray

The ever chic ginga ninja of the delightful blog Yours Truly - has put up a tutorial about how to create a beehive!

The step-by-step tute makes it look so straight forward, but my butter fingers and clumsy clips means that my beehive is more crappy than snappy!

Beehive

[Image via: Yours Truly]

My hair is growing at an achingly slow rate. It's skimming my ear lobes and when straightened is just touches the nape of my neck.

It was a silly idea to chop it off, my hairdresser warned me not too. If I had a penny for every time someone compared me to Shirley Temple I would be able to afford tickets to Golden Plains.

It hasn't been all snips and snails, and puppy dogs tails - It has been easy to roll out of bed and not have to attempt to tame a mass of curls.

But now I want a beehive.

Contemplation

'Contemplation seems to be about the only luxury that costs nothing.'

I Capture the Castle, Dodie Smith

[image via: fashion gone rogue]

Lost in Translation

For all my hype about Halloween I forgot that I’m one lazy Susan.

Instead of painting the town red in Dracula Spectacular makeup and madness, I followed Scarlett Johansson’s lead in ‘Lost in Translation’ and wore a pink wig.

It would have been so much more fun to dress up like Bill Murray. Next year perhaps.

Donning the blushing bob has inspired me to visit the hairdresser today and chop off my hair.

When i was younger i was jealous of girls with straight glossy hair. It would shimmer and glide over shoulders or be swept up in high ponytails with ease and grace. I had a frizzy, mousey mop of tangled curls.

I was oblivious to hair products except when used in toxic amounts by Boy Band members.

I eventually tamed the frizz was tamed, a few years after I took a punt and dyed it red. Oh happy day.

I want an avant garde hair style, like in the Kaaz Yearbook. I want something completely unattainable unless maintained by an army of professional hair stylists, enough hairspray to crave another hole in the ozone layer and a blowtorch. Or at the very least an industrial strength hairdryer.

But ruled by reason and a lazy streak, I settled with a bob, Molly Ringwald style.

Now i just need to learn the lipstick trick.

Mo mo Movember!

Usually a pinch and a punch are suffice to ring in a new month - but not on this auspicious day. Men around the country (and world) have their top lips a quiverin’ in concentration as Movember kicks off today!

Lauren carney

For all those follically challenged gents out there, here are a few old wives tales which supposedly induce thicker, stronger, longer hair growth:

1. Reduce stress – so whack on some Sigur Ros on the turntable

2. Enjoy a protein rich diet - one website lists brewer’s yeast as a top notch source of protein

3. Cut out caffeine

4. Stand on your head to increase blood flow to your scalp

Or you can just buy some Movember merch - like these tasty chocolate treats